Right off the bat, I’m going to tell you that “Baby One More Time” fails the Afternoon Delight Test. Sure, it’s got a lot of “baby” in it and might seem like a good song to sing to your kid, but as these things go, the lyrics get weird almost immediately. This one’s clearly about heartbreak and loneliness, as you can see from the lyrics (or hear in the video).

However, it does get kind of funny to read those lyrics with an actual baby in mind. You know, funny in the way that, in your head it makes you chuckle, but in real life it would just be sad and awkward. “Oh baby, baby/The reason I breathe is you/Now, boy you got me blinded.” Chuckles. Of course, the funniest line in the bunch is” Hit me baby one more time.” Lady, don’t let your kid bully you around like that!

Fun fact, one of my favorite bands Fountains Of Wayne was actually offered this song to do on one of their albums. They played and even recorded it, but didn’t think it really fit with them, so they passed. It then went on to be Britney Spears’ first big hit. So, I guess we have them to blame for still having to hear about a washed-up pop princess. Ah well, their version is still great and can be found on their B-sides and rarities record Out-Of-State Plates.